Sunday, July 8, 2012

Little Girl, Don't Cry

-This world is an awful place to live in. It is, on one level, a reflection of hell: Violence, disasters, injustice, depression, regret, oppression, lack of freedom, limitations-all are familiar symptoms of the malaise called life, which can be viewed in a rather pessimistic (one might even say nihilistic) way of viewing this world, as a sexually-transmitted disease, of which the prognosis is certain death.

-We are both having this same disease, the disease called life. Yet we suffer it in a different way. I suffer from lack of confidence in myself; you suffer from lack of trust in people most dearly to you. I don't trust in myself, hence I want to disappear all the time-this might as well be what that insane Jew by the name of Sigmund Freud called by the name of 'death desire', a desire to return back to being something that has no existence, a non-existing being, which goes by no name, has no corporeal or abstract existing elements in it-hence it is ultimately beyond grasp, very much like God Himself, except that God is 1 and the non-existent is 0.

But you on the other hand, want to have a value. You seek that value called existence, you want to grasp it, you want to be the One. And yes, you are the One, for that desire manifests itself, actualizes itself in the most beautiful way imaginable-the word 'imaginable' here does not even portray your beauty, your essence in a way that justifies your existence. And yet you find it perplexing that this existence, this value that you seek, ultimately brings pain to you, as you found yourself to be surrounded by the Others, the Others that would not help you make sense of what you are, who you want to be, and what you can be.

-This perplexity in turn, generates the death desire in you: yet returning back to being a non-existent being scares you; and that is why we both met each other, to seek solace in one another, in a brother-sisterhood of two Existences, you finding solace in my embracing of 0 and me finding wonder in your embracing of 1.

-I know that you won't read this, and even if you do, you won't understand this bull-crap full with Freud-mimicking utterances: but it's fine by me, as I am 0 and you are 1-we just don't really belong, for 1 multiplied by 0 equals 0: but maybe I am wrong, maybe we are both One, for we are both Existences-who knows but God, the One, the Existent.

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